Common Excuses You Might Be Considering to Avoid Talking to Dad About Assisted Living (One More Time)
How often do we generally make excuses to avoid doing things we don’t really want to do? If you’re like most people, excuses are easy. They may even come naturally. If you have been avoiding talking to your aging father about a sensitive topic, like assisted living, you probably have a number of excuses built-in on why this is the case.
Yet, when you understand you’re not alone, especially when it comes to discussing this elder care option, it can help assure you that the struggle is real for others, too. It may also give you some insight into what has worked for other people, especially men and women who faced the same excuses in the past.
One Potential Excuse: I don’t want to get into a fight.
Isn’t this one of the biggest ones on our list of excuses why we don’t talk about potentially sensitive topics with loved ones? We don’t want to get into an argument. We know that the sensitive topic can cause strong emotions, on both sides of the fence.
If you avoid talking to your father about assisted living because you don’t want to get into a fight, it probably means the topic has come up before. And, if the topic has been brought up before, it probably led to some frustration and those aforementioned strong emotional responses.
Just because you don’t want to get into a fight doesn’t mean you can’t discuss this incredibly important elder care topic with your father. It simply means you might have to look for a different way to bring it up.
One Potential Excuse: You don’t know much about it.
In this day and age, the Information Age, not knowing anything about a specific topic should not be an excuse. You can look up a great deal of information about assisted living and the more you know, the easier it is to talk about it.
Well, the more you know about a topic like assisted living, the more you can answer questions or counter objections your father might have that are likely rooted in misunderstandings or misconceptions about assisted living.
One Potential Excuse: He doesn’t know anybody at assisted living.
Are you certain of that? Is he? A lot of aging seniors who are reluctant to choose assisted living at first don’t know anybody or claim they don’t know a single person who is at assisted living. Then, they moved in and see friends they haven’t talked to in years.
Yes, it could be true that your father doesn’t know a single person who is currently at assisted living, but that might not be the case, either.
He wouldn’t know unless he decided on this for his future.
It may not be easy to talk about something as sensitive as elder care with an aging parent or other loved one. That doesn’t mean it’s not just as important to do so. If you use these excuses, hopefully you can understand there is a better way to approach it than what you’ve done before.